This may seem trivial but this can set a good rapport and put a small kink in a sale or even break the mood. This may be a pivotal point in your process and you didn’t even know it.
When someone takes the time to give a complement and hopefully the person giving it is being sincere they would like you to understand that it was heartfelt. Now when someone answers “It was no big deal” it took that complement and turned it into dirt. It also tells the person who gave it you as an individual have no respect for them. It is usually the small things that make or break a sale, or the small things turn into giant gaps or problems.
So what is the best way to handle all of this and make the complement to work out the best for both parties? The answer is something along the lines of “I appreciate that you noticed and by the way thank you for your kindness”.
This takes care of 2 things for 1 you are thanking them and 2 you are showing through your comment back that they were being kind. People who are kind usually make good decisions. As a bonus nobody answers this way so you can create a memorable experience.
So I would like to thank you all in advance for your kindness when it comes to your posts I do appreciate them.
Now go implement!
Complements can make the difference in a persons day that might have been having a bad one!
Trisha, sitting down with someone who is buying something or even just on the street we have no clue what they have been through. Maybe they are giving the complement in hopes to get one back.
Thanks
Scott
Hi Scott,
I admire how you point out that when one diminishes or rejects the compliment the giver, one insults the giver. Who would want to give anything else, like your business, when you are being subtly insulted? Great blog post.
Happy Dating and Relationships,
April Braswell
Dating Expert and Online Dating Coach
April, rejecting a complement is just wrong, thank you for yours.
Scott
Scott, you left out a third reason that your phrase “I appreciate that you noticed and by the way thank you for your kindness” works so well.
When you say that part “I appreciate that you noticed,” you are telling them that they are “smart.” After all, only a smart person notices things. We all know that stupid people are ignorant of their surroundings.
So you’re actually giving a HUGE compliment back to them. You can never go wrong complimenting someone. As we know from the “Law of Reciprocity” it will require them to give something back — more money for you!
Tim Van Milligan
Tim thats exactly the point to accept the complement and give one back. Thanks for the read.
Scott
Excellent post! I did a similar post about a year ago regarding accepting compliments graciously and teaching your kids to do the same. It is terrible when someone pays someone else a compliment and ends up wishing they never said anything because the person on the receiving end did something to belittle it or make them feel bad about it. Great advice.
Lisa McLellan
Babysitting Services, Nanny Services, and Nanny agencies
Children it would seem would be the first to take this advice but this also goes well with new people in the business field.
Thanks
Scott
Scott,
Receiving complements for some can be ackward and uncertain how to appropriately respond. This is a great post I will be referring others to!
Mark
Direct Selling Advice, Tips, Skills & Techniques
Mark, Thanks for the read. Since the reception can be awkward for the recipient it can also be for the person giving, that is why it is so important to accept it correctly.
Scott
THE old Scandinavian way in MN seemed to be to be embarrassed by compliments and to have to somehow let the person complimenting you know that you knew you did not deserve it. Several years ago, my friends and I realized we had grown up this way, and that we would make an effort to break the habit. IT WAS HARD!. When someone said or did something nice, the automatic response was to react disparagingly. I had to stop, take a deep breathe and just breath out…”Thank out”. I noticed such a difference in friends and clients. Your response is much better though.
Perhaps the problem is more widespread than just in MN? At any rate, following your advice is EXCELLENT advice.
Sonya Lenzo
http://www.yourchanceforromance.com
Glad to see that you liked the post, thanks for your comments.
Scott
Nothing like showing kindness to the other person. It can only help you in the long run.
Mike
http://www.ColumbiaSafetyProducts.com/blog
Scottie, this is great! it reminds me about the things we do become such a part of us, it is cool to look back to things that have helped bring us so far!!! YOU ROCK!!!
Scott,
I agree. I tell my sales people all the time, when you get a compliment never say “no prob”, we often go above and beyond, it’s ok to have the customer recognze that fact. Yet I continue to hear it.
Scott,
This is great advice and you make a very good point.
I am the person who tends to have a hard time accepting compliments. I will remember to accept graciously the next time I’m in a sales situation.
Sabrina Peterson, NASM CPT, CES
Fat Burning Home Workouts
Scott
Thank you noticing the complement and not dismissing it….I have always pointed out to clients it si the smallest of details where friendships and deals take place…let the other person know you value them .
alamghafoor.com
How true what you write. I want my business clients/students to be aware of this courteous response:
“I appreciate that you noticed and by the way thank you for your kindness”.
Thanks for your blog with its great tips,
Eileen O’Neill
Using Social Media in ESL/EFL/ESOL …
http://EslLessonUsingSocialMedia.com
You know, I totally agree with you 100%, I never say “it’s not big deal” or “it’s nothing”… in English. But I do it in French! I live in France now and picked it up because so many people say “it’s nothing.” I’ll have to remember that in French…
Sheesh! I never noticed that before, I’m glad I read your blog today!
Shane
Thanks Shane,
I beleive that this tidbit is universal no matter what the language.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Thanks for sharing this tidbit. I am horrible at accepting compliments, and it never really occurs to me that it is offensive to the compliment giver to brush it off. Next time, I will keep that in mind, and hopefully act more grateful!
Michelle
http://www.ThingsToDoForFreeIn.com
Michelle,
Normally if someone takes the time to give one, we should take the time to accept one.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
It is so hard to accept compliments…
Just saying Thank You is a big improvement over the standard response. I tend to say I appreciate that…
Seize the Day,
Rob
Simple Family Survival Tips For Disasters and Emergencies
Rob,
I couldnt agree more
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Excellent Scott I’m going to implement it right away!!
David Escalante
Bay Area Roofing San Francisco CA
David,
this will help you.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
“Now Go Implement”! I love this.
Scott, great advice. Thank you for sharing this with us. I promise to start implementing this today.
Yours In Health!
Dr. Wendy
http://www.kettlebellolympia.com
Wendy,
Cool to see that you saw that.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Thanks for the tip! I never thought about it that way! Your advice struck me so much I printed out your answer. I plan to keep it on my desk as a reminder to be appreciative of people’s compliments.
Thanks!
Peggy Larson
http://customhomemadegifts.com
Peggy,
Glad to see you enjoyed the blog.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
I agree,
Accept it graciously as long as it was sincere.
Bob
Make Time for Your Health Now or Make Time for Sickness and Disease Later. Your Choice
Thanks Robert,
You make a great point the complement along with the acceptance has to be sincere.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
I still have trouble enjoying a compliment and tend to downplay it. I like your response because you can repay the compliment without sounding like you blew it off.
Jennifer Battaglino
The Harwood Group – Tinnitus, Chronic Illness, Fears, and Anxiety
Thanaks Jennifer,
I hope that this is something that helps you in the future.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Scott,
Great advice on how to take a compliment well. A lot of people discount compliments today and seem uncomfortable receiving them. Your advice can help them.
Steve Chambers, Body Language Speaker
Thanks Steve
It does make a difference.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Mike,
Everybody wants to feel appreciated, its when they feel like they are not is when problems occur.
Scott Sylvan Bell
http://www.scottbellconsultant.com
Now go implement!
Wow, another gem of advice!
I learned this one the hard way years ago from a beautiful woman I wanted to date.
She gave me a compliment & I jokingly dismissed it as nothing only to learn in terse terms
how I had not only devalued her opinion but also really was insulting her intelligence.
Definitely not the result I had intended!
You’re so right that so few people know how to gracefully accept a compliment.
It’s really annoying to get the minimal head nod and a “oh sure, no problem”
lackadaisical response from someone when you’re trying to show your gratitude.
Keep up the great work Scott. I really enjoy reading this blog of yours!
Michael
The Success Secrets
Dear Scott,
So many people do need to reprogram their mind to success thinking to learn how to correctly accept a genuine complement. What an excellent selling point reminder!
April Braswell
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